The Extensive Value of Creativity
I’m listening to Type O Negative today as I write.
It’s the anniversary of Peter Steele’s (google him people!) death so I figured I’d better play some of his music in memoriam.
Actually, that’s a load of nonsense. There is very rarely a day, when I don’t play Peter Steele. The man’s voice is very, very, good for my mental health. And his lyric writing is spectacular.
Sigh. Anyhoo, the man had his troubles and as he himself said, he used his music as therapy. That makes him pretty damn wise in my book. Creativity, in any shape or form, is the best way that I have found to sort shit out in my head.
Don’t get me wrong.
I’m also a strong advocate of medication when needed and I firmly believe that everyone needs counselling at some point in their lives. I have, and continue to do, both of those things. But what really helped me to move forward in this long, childless journey, was the decision to finally write my novel.
No, no, there’s no point heading off to Amazon, I haven’t published it yet. But I will. The goal is actually by November this year.
I’ve wanted to write a novel since my teenage years, when I couldn’t find any half decent Vampire books to read. (Do not! Absolutely do not mention Sparklers to me!) But it wasn’t until I decided that I had to find a way to cope with this pain, that I decided to actually do it. I’d spent twenty or so years working in mental health and had told countless clients that they should write out their feelings. I figured it was time I practiced what I preached.
Although I knew it would help, I didn’t really understand just how much it would help. I get to talk about my childlessness in a way I don’t seem to be able to in real life. I get to be really angry about it, and display that anger in a way that would get me arrested normally. I even get to make it funny and ridiculous, which is an amazing act of healing in itself.
And, maybe more importantly, I have something in my life that I truly love. That I get excited just thinking about, that lights me up in a way that nothing else does. And it’s something that proves I was here. That I existed and that I had something valuable to contribute to this world.
This book is my baby and I have lots of plans for brothers and sisters.